The Road through my Fucked Up Life.

Road paved on 1:28 PM |

Everyone, meet...

He is an O2 XDAII mini and his name is Max.

Well, he used to be a she, Richard named him/her Mini. So I thought to myself, hell, there is no way I am going to make love to a female (well, if I'll actually do it is another story on its own), so I decided to send him/her to do a sex-change and wahlah... Max is finally here!

I have an O2 mini,
His name is Max...i.

We signed the relationship agreement yesterday, when Richard walked Max down the aisle and sold him to me. He looks pretty amazing (Max, I mean), but I decided that a white tuxedo doesn't look as nice, so I'm going to buy a nice black suit for Max... so he would look super nice beside Peesp.

Anyway, my K700i, the first phone I bought on my own is given to my sister. It has served me well, and though it has been dropped countless times, it has yet to fail me. It throws fits and has mood swings... but it was a good phone. I have filled him with excellent ringtones and so much games that it had kept me company during lectures. Goodbye my friend... you have been a good friend.

But now with Max, it would be more games and much more stuff. So Max is going to be my constant companion cos duh... I'm using him as a phone. And with Peesp hanging on my other arm, it would be like walking arm in arm with two of the most handsome techtools in the world.

This is how I would look like if someone took a CT scan of my waist.

Well, maybe without the pathology of C (cookie to who can tell me what pathology).

Now look, I have barely enough place to keep my stuff on me. So how would a TX fit in I did not get Max? If I had gotten the TX which I would have named T-Rex, I would have a boyfriend who is gonna just stay at home on my desk, waiting for my return, because face it, I love my Peesp more than T-Rex. And I would be using Peesp more often than T-Rex. And now imagine me walking around with so many things hanging around me.

So Max is a good choice indeed. Hrmph! No regrets.

Oh ya, Richard is using my sister's Nokia 2300 temporarily, so now he has a phone which is black-and-white and monophonic and can't play games accept Snake.
Richard's new phone:
Oh, how the great has fallen.

And as a present for our new relationship, I bought Max a new screen protector (Martin Field) and going to buy him a new crystal casing. Woot.. and not to forget the new black housing. Before you guys come up and say that I no longer pamper Peesp, I have also bought him a new screen protector and a new original game!

This is a very funny game where you roll a katamari (which looks like a sushi ball) and you roll over all the different stuff so that you form a huge sushi ball. And control the little green guy and it's like: "Wow, I just rolled over a cow!" "Hey, that fat man looks good on my katamari!"
And if you game over, you get tied to a string ala SM style and get whipped by a naked purple man. Scary.
He is the little green guy's father.


I paid RM1300 for Max. He came with the normal pack and an extra 1gig SD card and a white silicon case. Now for how I got the money is a heartaching story. I told my dad that Max cost RM1000 cos being the filial daughter, I tot that I should top it up myself. So dad got ready the RM1000. On the other hand, I have just gotten a RM1000 cheque from my uncle because he made a bet with me that if I wore a dress, he would pay me RM1000. So I wore that blardy dress and is RM1000 richer. Woot. Then I pass the cheque to my dad so he can bank it in for me or convert it to cash.
And the night before Max and I signed the relationship agreement:
Dad: So you want the RM1000 cash ah? Not dangerous meh?
And before I could stop myself, me being the filial daughter: I can use uncle's RM1000 to pay for the mini lor.
The moment that fucking sentence jumped out of my mouth, I was thinking : How fuckingly stupid can I be?!!!

So I watch my father agree and slipped that huge chunk of RM1000 cash back into the safe and pulled out the RM1000 he was going to give me to buy Max. Oh... the pain, the hurt, the fucking stupid knife stabbing my guts for my stupidity. I could have gotten Max AND RM1000 cash if not for my fucking mouth and piety.

Next time, just keep my fucking mouth close and shrug. Grrr... FUCK.

Shut up Elena. You're making me sober.
- Reno, Final Fantasy VII

We passed by on 1:28 PM |

Road paved on 2:12 PM |

Have you...

( ) Smoked a cigarette - Will never try.
( ) Smoked a cigar - Might buy, just for collection sake.
( ) Made out with a member of the same sex - Now that would be interesting.
(x) Been in love - Who hasn't?
(x) Been dumped - Love and war... they go hand in hand.
(x) Shoplifted - for condoms in Guardian during my bday party. Hell, that was cool.
( ) Been fired - Haven't worked anywhere before and haven't joined the Apprentice.
(x) Been in a fist fight - Yes... and it feels so good to punch the bastard in the face and drown him in mud.
( ) Snuck out of you parent's house - I don't sneak. I just walk out.
(x) Had feelings for someone who didnt have them back - Loving someone doesn't mean they have to love you back. And I was young... so young.
( ) Been arrested - Would love to try that. But no, I'm gonna be a doctor, no black marks on my history.
( ) Made out with a stranger - Haven't really made out with anyone before.
( ) Gone on a blind date - I don't need a blind date.
(x) Lied to a friend - Who haven't? Like when you were supposed to meet them for mamak and you decided to stay at home and make love to your BF, you tell them: "I have tummyache, sorry can't go." And BF here is Peesp.
(x) Had a crush on a teacher - I know it is sick... but I did and I can't remember his name.
(x) Skipped school - Who doesn't? All the time when I was a prefect.
( ) Slept with a co-worker - Not working. But it would be cool to be like in Gray's Anatomy... wait, that's her boss.
( ) Seen someone die - Gonna see it soon when I start working in the hospital. COnsultant pointing to me: "You, call it." So cool!!!
( ) Been to Canada
( ) Been to L.A
( ) Been to Las Vegas - Will love to. For the cabarets, casinos and stripshows. Haha.
( ) Been to Mexico
(x) Been on a plane - Of course. DO you think I'm a budak from Miri?
( ) Mile high club - This I must try one day. What you don't know what is this? Google it.
( ) Slept with someone overseas - No time. Everytime I'm overseas... schedules get in the way, so no.
( ) Thrown up in a bar - I hold my alcohol pretty well, thank you.
( ) Set a part of myself on fire - For what? Set someone's elses pants on fire got la.
(x) Eaten sushi - Sushi King lor.
( ) Been moshing/crowd surfing at a show - Haven't been to a rock concert before.
( ) Love someone and miss someone right now - Love yes, miss no.
(x) Laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by - Yes... so long long ago.
(x) Made a snow angel - Yeap, in Korea.
( ) Had a tea party - When I was like what? 5 years old?
(x) Flown a kite - Yes yes yes. Wanna do it again.
(x) Built a sand castle - Finally did a proper on in Kuching.
(x) Riden through puddles on a bike - And splashed everyone on the pavement.
(x) Gone puddle jumping - Yes... with the puddle as deep as my weight.
( ) Played dress up - Yeah... dress my brother up as a doll.
( ) Jumped into a pile of leaves - No autumn in M'sia. Will do so in Aussie.
( ) Gone sledding - Planning to go dog-sledding in Siberia/Alaska.
(x) Cheated while playing a game - Who doesn't? I have no time to around levelling my characters when I have an exam the very next day.
(x) Been bored - All the time.
(x) Fallen asleep at work/school - Everyday in lecture.
(x) Used a fake id - To fake a policeman when I forgot to bring my driving license.
(x) Watched the moon set - Yes... was waiting for sun rise, so at the same time mah wait for moon set.
(x) Felt an earthquake - Aceh earthquake felt all the way to Klang.
(x) Touched a snake - In snake temple, Penang.
(x) Been tickled - As a baby, as a girl.
( ) Been robbed - Touchwood. Hopefully never.
(x) Been misunderstood - Who haven't? All of us are. But I don't kill myself over it.
(x) Pet a reindeer/goat - Goat which ate my notes in KL deer park.
(x) Won a contest - Wee... so many, lost count.
(x) Ran a red light - All the time. Welcome to M'sia, dude.
(x) Had detention at school - So long ago... can't remember for what.
(x) Been in a car accident - 3 times I drove during traffic jams. 2 times Richard drove.
( ) Felt like an outcast - I think I am an outcast, but I don't feel like it.
( ) Eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night - I can only handle the small bucket of Haagen Daaz Belgian Choc.
(x) Had deja vu - Din't I just do this?
( ) Danced in the moonlight - So romantic. I want I want.
( ) Hated the way you look - God made me this way. I like it.
(x) Witnessed a crime - Hit and run. Crime right?
( ) Questioned your heart - Why would I again?
( ) Been obsessed with post-it notes - What post-it notes? You mean those yellow decorations on my books?
(x) Squished barefoot through the mud - And did synchronized swimming too. Orientation again.
( ) Been lost - With my sense of direction? Never.
(x) Been to the opposite side of the country - Just came back from the East.
(x) Swam in the ocean - Tioman is in the ocean, Kuching beach also. Port Dickson and Pangkor also count?
(x) Felt like dying - yeah... especially when the exams are around the corner.
( ) Cried yourself to sleep - Cry? It would have kept me awake.
(x) Played cops and robbers - Last played in Form 1.
(x) Recently colored with crayons/colored pencils/markers - Sister's coloring book. I was bored, sue me.
(x) Sung karaoke - Debaters, we got to do this again.
(x) Paid for a meal with only coins - Ice kacang with 3 50cents coin.
(x) Done something you told yourself you wouldn't - All the time.
(x) Made prank phone calls - yeah... in China. Long story.
(x) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose - Milo at some lame joke my friends made in Sunway Lagoon.
( ) Caught a snowflake on your tongue - No snowfall in M'sia
(x) Danced in the rain - For fun and got sick the next day, not fun.
(x) Written a letter to Santa Claus - I was a kid... I stop writing 2 years ago. I write cause I know my parents read em. Hehe.
( ) Been kissed under a mistletoe - Mistletoe don't grow in M'sia.
( ) Watched the sun set with someone you care about - Sun set watch got la... someone I care about don't have.
(x) Blown bubbles - yes, and trying to catch them at the same time.
( ) Made a bonfire on the beach - I think I did before... can't remember
( ) Crashed a party - If I don't get invited, I don't go.
(x) Gone rollerskating/blading - and skin my knees and elbows. Not fun.
(x) Had a wish come true - I wish to pass EoS, I did. I wish to get Peesp, I did.
( ) Worn pearls - What do I look like? A woman?
( ) Jumped off a bridge - Can't wait for it tho. Buggie jumping in Aussie Outbacks.
( ) Ate dog/cat food - What the hell for?
( ) Told a complete stranger you loved them - Wait... why would you tell a complete stranger that?
( ) Kissed a mirror - Who do you think I am? Vasan?
( ) Sang in the shower - Let's not make it rain worse.
( ) Have a black dress - Nope. Any dress I have UNfortunately worn is my sis'.
( ) Had a dream that you married someone - Never.
( ) Glued your hand to something
( ) Got your tongue stuck to a flag pole or freezer - not tongue, fingers got.
( ) Kissed a fish - Yes... dead with wasabi on the tongue. Must tongue it too. Orientation days...
(x) Worn the opposite sexes clothes - Yes. And I have to say I look quite good in a tuxedo.
(x) Been a cheerleader - Mascot in Semester 1.
(x) Sat on a roof top - in India, listening to the sunday school
(x) Screamed at the top of your lungs - ever tried screaming louder than aeroplanes taking off?
(x) Attempted a one-handed cartwheel - Underwater counts?
( ) Talked on the phone for more than 6 hours - Longest was 2 hours and we were playing Final Fantasy IX together.
( ) Didn't take a shower for a week - 2 days got la.
( ) Pick and ate an apple right off the tree - No apple trees in M'sia. Durian got la.
(x) Climbed a tree - to steal rambutans and got bitten by red ants.
( ) Had a tree house - Oooo.. calvin and hobbes. Nope. I don't.
( ) Are scared to watch scary movies alone - Yes. Donno why. They are so dumb.
( ) Believe in ghosts - Not sure. Holy Ghost is still technically a ghost.
( ) Have more than 30 pairs of shoes - I'm not Imelda Marcos... wait that's 3000 pairs.
( ) Worn a really ugly outfit to school just to see what others say - No, cute got la.
( ) Gone streaking - I don't streak. No free show.
( ) Played chicken - what chicken?
(x) Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on - Yeah. Wearing white shirt too.
( ) Caught a fish then ate it - I was too busy scuba diving to do so.
(x) Caught a butterfly - Yeah. At the butterfly park.
(x) Laughed so hard you cried - can't remember why.
(x) Cried so hard you laughed - cos cannot remember why we are crying for.
( ) Mooned/flashed someone - again, free show is no no.
( ) Had someone moon/flash you - now that would be an experience won't it?
(x) Cheated on a test - Who doesn't? Haha. Those were the days la. Remember, Grace?
(x) Have a Britney Spears CD - Sad to say it is on my CD shelf, but it belongs to my sis.
(x) Forgotten someone's name - Hell, I can't remember half of my readers' names.
(x) Slept naked - Yeah. Was wondering how it felt like... and it feels good.

Why do you keep touching me?
- Alleria, Warcraft II

We passed by on 2:12 PM |

Road paved on 5:20 PM |

I've decided that my New BF would be:

*hides behind boulder* Ok, Yeep, you can stop throwing stuff at me! Lemme explain.

The reason I made this decision is due to a decision that Richard made. NO, not Richard made the decision for me, but he made another decision:



*hides behind another boulder*
He is not selling it because it is lousy! He is just going to buy an O2 Atom Exec.

Before I go into other details, let me just explain the history of Richard's O2 mini.

It was first owned by this guy who works in Hicom. He got it as a birthday gift last October (why nobody give me such a good gift?), and found it too complicating for his liking (he found it complicating, I LIKE complicating) and decided to sell it after keeping it for the sake of tokenism for 10 months. Meaning that before it landed in Richard's hand, the poor mini was sitting in a drawer, gathering dust.

So Richard bought it for RM1360... when others would gladly kill to buy such a good conditioned mini for RM1500 above. A second-hand well-used mini sells for about RM1100, so RM1360 for a mini which had not been used is simply to delicious to be passed on.

And so Richard got that mini and started updating it, stabilising it and all that crap. The main reason he got the mini and not the newer O2 Atom was that Atom ran on WM5.0 which was thought to be NOT able to use cracked medical programs (for my less tech-savvy joggers, just understand that cracked softwares are illegal/pirated softwares). So hence the mini.

But then Siddarth, who got himself an O2 Exec managed to run crack medical softwares on his Exec which runs on WM5.0, and thus began Richard's exodus to getting cracks to work for WM5.0. And his latest conquest was the Dell Axim. Now finally convinced that the crack he obtained was usable on WM5.0, he decided to get the new

which costs RM2700++. And so to fund that enormous amount of cash, I, being the nice GF, decided to buy the O2 mini for RM1300.

So that's the whole story.

Oh... and to those who did not know, Richard just got the O2 mini last month, and his handphone before that, the Motorola V3i is only 6 months old, and still has 6 months warranty.

He has blogged about his handphones HERE. I'm going to emphasis on how long he owned each phones.
His history of handphones:
#1: Nokia 3210 Dec 2000 - May 2001 (6 months)


#2: Nokia 8210 May 2001 - Jan 2002 (6 months)


#3: Nokia 8850 Jan 2002 - May 2003 (18 months)

#4: Nokia 6150 May 2003 - May 2005 (24 months)


#5: Nokia 7610 May 2005 - Feb 2006 (8 months)


#6: Motorola Razr V3i Feb 2006 - Aug 2006 (6 months)


#7: O2 XDAII mini Aug 2006 - Sept 2006 (1 month)


#8: 02 Atom Exec Sept 2006 - ??? (maybe 2 years)


I have seen other guys who has a many a handphones, and I have also seen people who still used their handphones that are like dinosaurs. But to me, Richard goes through his handphones like a girl goes through clothes (other girls but me).

So one would wonder, would he go through girlfriends like how he goes through handphones? *shiver at the thought* I mean, the longest a phone ever lasted him was 2 years... and then it was duly thrown aside to get a newer model. And when something that looks better comes out, he throws his old HP aside and goes chasing after the skirts of the new HP.

Anyway, I'm going home to prepare a special spot for my new BF... got to think of a name for him, and get a black housing so he would match Peesp... Ooo... can't wait.

Soon, I'll use this voodoo cannonball
to send my significant other
to the significant OTHERWORLD!
Bwa, ha, ha. That'll show her how much I truly care.
- LeChuck, Curse of Monkey Island

We passed by on 5:20 PM |